Optimus Prime Doesn't Stop Drinking !!

Wired Magazine's cover story depicted Optimus Prime stepping in as a father figure for those whose father didn't bother. (I guess their Mom was the television. I think in my home the television is more like a deadbeat uncle that pays no rent, runs up our electrical bills, but fascinates the children with wonderful stories and games, in between commercials and a lot of crap.

Michael Bay is not alone on his mission to destroy these latchkey kids' kindergarten memories of their surrogate father. Capital Bullshit has beaten Mikey to the punch. Doesn't hurt that another childhood television legend, (I can't believe I just called him that) and German rock god (maybe I just justified that last comment, and no, I'm not talking about Klaus Meine) has provided the fodder for their celebrity parody mashup.


Optimus Hasselhoff.

David Hasselhoff's fall from grace.

Tasty spoon, indeed!


Huge freakin' statue of Optimus Prime. Thanks, Karate Party.

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